The holidays really are among the best times of the year for our family. Although, there is a certain amount of stress involved in coordinating our travel plans from South Carolina with our own family and synching it up with our extended families.
I almost cynically called this column “Joe and Heidi’s Excellent Christmas Vacation Adventure,” giving a nod to both Chevy Chase’s holiday comedy “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation,” and Keanu Reeves’ cult classic “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure.” But thank the Lord, our time on the road was rather uneventful on this trip, especially compared to Thanksgiving. The day before Thanksgiving our old car’s fuel pump quit on me and stalled at a busy intersection in Philadelphia, during rush hour! Let’s just say the long line of folks stuck behind me weren’t showing me a lot of that “City of Brotherly Love” attitude that day.
While we don’t even remotely come close to the chaos and hilarity of the aforementioned films, we always have our share of challenges and good old-fashioned fun when we get with family.
The trip north to Pittsburgh started with me declaring, “No way are we fitting all this stuff and the dog into our car!” but somehow, we figured it out. Our new car has this fancy rear hatch camera such that the picture shows up in the rear-view mirror, so we literally took up every square inch of trunk space. The big unknown, of course, was how many gifts we would be bringing back.
So, we loaded up the Santa Fe Hybrid sleigh and off we went. Goodbye sunny and 70, into the unknown we go. Heidi did check out AccuWeather / she was checking it twice / gotta find out if we’ll hit snow or ice! Sorry, couldn’t resist. I mean, what would a Christmas in Pennsylvania be without a little wintry mix? More on that later.
We made it to Da’Burgh via I-77 through North Carolina, Virginia and West Virginia without incident. Along the way we found gas in West Virginia for $1.829 a gallon! Interestingly, with our new hybrid we cut out almost two full tanks of gas on our 1,500-mile journey, which we have taken more times than I care to mention in 2025.
So once again we settled in at my parents’ house, as they have hosted Christmas one way or another at my childhood home in Penn Hills since 1966. At 88-years-young, my mother, Angie Battista, is still a force to be reckoned with when it comes to the “hostess doing the mostest.” She looks like she is in her young 70s and has almost as much energy. While I have many incredible holiday memories at my grandmother’s and aunt’s and uncle’s homes with all my cousins, the one common denominator has been my parents, my brother Jan and his family, and my crew.
We departed Pittsburgh mid-morning of the 24th and made a quick stop in State College. The original plan was to stop at Way Fruit Farm for a half bushel of Golden Delicious Apples, then head to Meyer Dairy for chocolate milk and off to the Creamery for Peppermint Stick ice cream. Well, we called an audible when our son Ryan let his high school buddies know we were making a quick stop in town at lunchtime and boom, a table for nine at the Waffle Shop instantly materialized.
It was what the holidays are really all about. The hugs, the smiles, the funny stories all shared by a loyal group of friends: JBo, Marty, David, Bendy, James, Shant and Bubba. We stayed so long that Meyer Dairy and the Creamery closed earlier than usual because, after all, it was Christmas Eve.
Our hosts every year in Danville are my sister and brother-in-law, Karen and Mike Tinstman, and my niece and nephew Dr. Michaelynn Notz and Dr. Greg Notz, who both work at Geisinger Hospital. We know it’s the holiday’s when you smell the morning bacon being cooked by our nephew Travis Brown and we get to feast on Aunt Karen’s treats, especially her wedding soup, as we try to resist all her cookies!
So, getting back to that aforementioned wintry mix. A storm suddenly descended upon Central Pennsylvania dumping several inches of snow, sleet, and freezing rain. Where were my skates when I needed them? The Notzes live in a beautiful home on 40 acres of land atop a private hillside. Our kids had to park their cars at the bottom of the hill and walk 1/4 mile up through the woods because the driveway was basically solid ice. Travis and my son Jonathon actually “ski-skated” back down the driveway to reach Travis’ car to make it back to the Tinstman home base.
At both Pittsburgh and Danville we watched a lot of football and had those legendary Christmas movies “National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation,” “Home Alone” and “Home Alone 2” playing in the background while we played games. While playing the card game “Crush,” which I never win at, I must have said “I hate this game!” at least 50 times as the kids all laughed at me.
One of the highlights was playing a new-to-us board game called “Articulate.” As it turns out, we have the UK version of the game, so anytime you landed on the “World” or “Person” categories, you had a 50-50 chance the word was going to be an English city or European celebrity none of us knew. The best clues given under the “World” category were: “Blank and Barrel” to which that team quickly answered “Crate.” However, it was pointed out that the word (category was “World”) was Crete, as in the island! Another clue was “It’s a city in Spain” to which players shouted out “Barcelona? Madrid? Seville?” But after time ran out the clue giver said “Ecuador!”
Our daughter was her team’s clue giver for a “Person,” and she frustratingly passed on her first two unrecognizable names, so she had to play the next name. Well, she just started laughing, and laughing to the point of tears and had us all laughing at her wondering what word could elicit such a reaction? The person was, Zinedine Zidane. Well unless you are French or an ardent European football (soccer) fan, you’d have no idea. It turns out that not only was he one of the best footballers of all-time and a former coach of Real Madrid, but he’s also so famous in Europe that he’s simply known by the name Zizou. Wow, like who knew?
I was probably the worst player of the bunch at “Articulate” because I was stubbornly determined not to pass on my word but deconstruct it and get my partners to put the answer together. The problem is you only have 30 seconds, and the idea is to answer as many questions as possible. Nothing gets by me.
Our final stop up north was at our son Jonathon’s place in Washington, D.C. It was a first time visit for our son Ryan’s girlfriend, Audrey, so we jumped on the subway and took a trip to see the National Mall, the Washington Monument and the Capitol. We spent several hours at the Smithsonian Museum of American History and the Air and Space Museum. If you’ve ever been to any of the Smithsonian Museums, you know that you could spend days in each facility. I’m still partial to the Air and Space Museum because, as a kid, all I wanted was to be an astronaut and land on the moon like Neil Armstrong.
Well, we made it back, even snuck in a stop at Buc-ee’s in Florence, South Carolina. If you haven’t heard of the Texas-based Buc-ee’s (think Sam’s Club meets Sheetz), it’s only a matter of time as they are popping up everywhere.
It’s sunny, it’s warm, and we’re back in time for my all-important Winter League senior softball game.
I hope you had an amazing holiday season, a merry Christmas, and from the Battista family to yours, have a happy and blessed New Year!
