How about some great news from the youth sports world for a change? We certainly have had our share of negatives in this era where parents aren’t content to just be fans. They’ve become their kid’s agents. Too often, they choose to promote their own children’s “brand” and emphasize the “me” over the “we” these days.
Well, what I witnessed at our Overspeed Hockey’s Sun Valley Experience camp on July 19 may be one of the greatest displays of sportsmanship I have ever seen. And it came from a pair of 10-year-old goalies: Braxton Miles, from Jackson, Wyoming, and Harper Renz, from Idaho Falls, Idaho. It happened late in the final day of camp, during the camper’s scrimmage game, and was one of the most amazing and unanticipated events and it brought this old coach to tears and joy to my heart.
Harper, in only her second year of playing hockey, was feeling extremely stressed out over her performance in front of her teammates and the crowd of parents in the stands. Adding to her stress was a brand-new set of braces that brought physical discomfort to her during an already physically challenging on- and off-ice schedule for the week. After a goal was scored late in the second period, Harper struggled to get back in the net. Camp instructor Chad O’Brien, who was refereeing the game along with me, attempted to console her and encourage her. I was with the other 10 players at center ice preparing to drop the puck to restart the game. Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye I spot young Braxton skating by me from the opposite end of the rink.
My first reaction was to look over to the bench to see if head goalie coach Evi Johnson was planning to switch goalies. She shrugged her shoulders to indicate this wasn’t her doing. When I turned back to see what Braxton was doing, I was suddenly in total awe of what I was witnessing. Braxton hugged his fellow goalie, and speaking goalie mask to goalie mask, gave her words of encouragement. Then he did a fist bump with Harper (which takes on a new meaning with goalie gloves on!), tapped her leg pads with his stick to say, “you got this girl” and skated back past the rest of the players who were lined up at center ice.
So here is this seasoned group of coaches, with years of experience around the world, from the NHL to international competitions to junior hockey and all levels of college hockey, and we all collectively had the same instant reaction with our jaws wide open. “Wow! How cool was that?!” Suddenly the players on the ice began doing a rapid stick tap while the parents in the stands applauded loudly at the truly amazing actions of these two 10-year-olds.
I have been skating for almost 55 years and teaching hockey clinics and camps for over 40. For me personally, this was one of the most amazing displays of sportsmanship and selflessness that I have seen in my career. For anyone who witnessed it in person, it was an unforgettable, spontaneous moment, the kind that reminds us of why kids play the game and the positive character traits that can develop when youth sports are done right.
I have written several articles in recent years about my frustration with what has happened to youth sports including “The Joys of Coaching Youth Sports” and “Respect and Responsibility are Vital in All Level of Sports.” I’ve shared stories about parents getting into fights in the stands, coaches going at it on the fields, courts and ice and athletes physically attacking referees. We hover over our kids so much when it comes to sports, and we are too often invisible when it comes to supervising their online activities where they pick up so many bad habits. The lack of discipline and sportsmanship is largely responsible for the vast drop off of kids playing sport after the age of 13.
I had the chance to speak with Harper’s parents, Ashley and Garrett Renz, about the events that unfolded. Ashley told me, “I am happy that so many others were as moved over Braxton’s actions as we were. He is a wonderful young man and was the best thing for Harper that came out of last week.”
She continued, “I can tell you that Harper just turned 10 in May and has only played hockey for two years. All she wanted to learn last year was goalie. However, our association would not let her pick that position to play until she’s 12U. So, she only had the opportunity to try goalie out maybe 2 times during practice last year, and she played goalie during one game at an all-girl “friendly” in Teton Valley.”
Ashley and Garrett’s son Grayson (7) also attended the camp where I was the head instructor for the U10 group, which also included Harper and Braxton.
They added, “That is why we searched for a camp this summer; we wanted her to have that opportunity to learn to play goalie in a way she was not able to get at home in Idaho Falls. She loved the camp staff, especially Coach Evi. Now she is moving so much more comfortably in her [goalie] pads, and she learned more in five days than she had all last year. Hopefully she has a chance to continue to grow and develop that set of skills this year.”
When I asked Braxton what made him skate the length of the ice to encourage Harper, he said, “Because I was her a couple years ago when I just started playing goalie. I know what she was feeling and just thought she needed some encouragement.” This is from a 10-year-old mind you! He continued, “I went through it, so I said ‘Look at all you’ve learned here.’ I asked her, ‘Can you do a butterfly with your pads now? Well, you learned that at camp. Just stick with it and keep practicing.’ We formed a bond during the week.”
I also spoke with Braxton and his parents, Tim and Jamey, by phone. Braxton, who is in his fifth year of hockey and third year as a goalie, plays for the Jackson Moose of the Jackson (Wyoming) Youth Hockey Association. His father, Tim, said “Braxton had been there. No one wanted to play goalie and the Squirt (U10) coach asked him to play up a level even as a mite (U8), so he had empathy with Harper. He absolutely loved the camp and the camp staff.”
I asked Braxton what he likes best about hockey. He immediately answered with a big smile, “I love seeing people get body checked!” We both laughed and then he added, “I also like making new friends.” His father said that Braxton is always the first one at practice and the last one to leave. He added that next year they will definitely be back, and they will bring their raft to enjoy the Salmon River and the lakes in the area.
Overspeed Hockey goalie coach Evi Johnson said, “Braxton helped me out all week encouraging Harper, which culminated in that heartwarming moment during the game. He really seemed to understand the value of being a good teammate and helping others get better right alongside his own improvements. It was great to see!”
Like most camps I’ve been involved with over the past 40 years, we had a few minor incidents where kids got overly aggressive, and it resulted in a retaliation. When these issues occur, we get the two combatants together, make them shake hands and apologize to each other. It’s a teachable moment for U10s that is easily passed over.
Overspeed Hockey owner and head instructor Toby O’Brien was almost moved to tears at what he saw. “After more than 35 years’ operating and working at youth hockey development programs, that was one of the coolest things I have ever been a part of,” he said. “During our final day of camp, a young and inexperienced goalie was struggling. The staff was offering support and encouragement and doing their best to instill confidence in Harper. What happened next left all of us speechless, overjoyed, proud, and so much more.”
Toby continued, “I’ve experienced many good things in my lifetime but what Braxton did for Harper is right at the top of the highest mountain of goodness. We open camp and talk to all the players and families about the ‘we’ over the ‘me.’ There is so much ‘me’ in today’s society. To see and be a part of this incredible display of ‘we’ and positive humanity out of 10-year-olds will leave a mark with me forever. I truly hope all of the players and families at Campion Ice House will be a little better each day as a result of the acts of kindness of these 10-year-olds!”
Kirk Golden, assistant coach for Vermont State University at Castleton, is another veteran camp instructor and he said, “Hockey is much more than a game. It is moments like Braxton’s incredible show of sportsmanship that are able to emotionally move an entire arena.”
In today’s social media driven world we tend to be focused on the negative, outrageous, and bizarre things that get posted and are reported on TV. We need to show more examples of good deeds, and classy, selfless actions especially in sports.
For those of us who were, there it was one of the most heartwarming and memorable moments in sports that we’ve ever witnessed. Genuine sportsmanship on display for all to see. It’s about time we learn from the example of a couple 10-year-olds and make sportsmanship a priority once again.
