“Whoa! Ok! Ok! Ok! Ok! My turn. You don’t have a crystal ball. You can’t look at a kid and predict his future any more than I can. I’ve sat at those tables and listened to you tell those parents ‘When I know, I know. And when it comes to your son. I know.’ And you don’t. You don’t.”
– Billy Beane as portrayed by Brad Pitt in Moneyball
A little less than two weeks ago CBS Sports published a story with a headline that started, “Inside how Notre Dame hired Penn State’s Micah Shrewsberry…” They went on to tout it as, “an exclusive behind-the-scenes look.” As a Penn State fan I was intrigued that the article might include some insight into Penn State’s part in the equation, so I went ahead and read it.
Certainly the article painted Penn State in a less-than-favorable light for waiting too long to negotiate a new contract with Shrewsberry. As the article states, “Had Penn State come in January with a contract extension, Shrewsberry is almost certainly still coaching there.”
However, the parts that most interested me involved some insights regarding Shrewsberry’s neighbor. You see, the Shrewsberrys put a basketball court in their backyard after they moved to State College and apparently a neighbor didn’t appreciate it. Reportedly, she would complain about noise in the middle of the afternoon, and one time called the cops – which resulted in two policemen meeting Mrs. Shrewsberry in her driveway when she got home at 7:30 p.m..
But as unwelcoming as those actions were, the most important takeaway from the article for me was this: One time when Shrewsberry’s sons, Braden and Nick, were playing basketball on the backyard court, the neighbor supposedly yelled across the yard, “You’re not going to the NBA! Give it up already!”
And there it is. An adult telling kids they’re not good enough athletes. In this case possibly absurdly so.
A few years ago a young high school athlete we know was told by his coach that there was only one kid on his team that was good enough to be a D1 athlete in college, and it wasn’t going to be him. Turns out the coach was wrong by a factor of four, including that young athlete. And not just any D1 teams – several played on teams that, based on end-of-season rankings, were better than Penn State’s teams in their respective sports.
My wife and I have a college friend who was told many years ago by her high school coach that she wasn’t good enough to play college volleyball. A few years later, she was in a volleyball gym class at Penn State and the teacher was so impressed with her that he asked Russ Rose to come to the class and watch her. Russ Rose commented to her, “You’re pretty good.” She told Russ that her high school coach told her she couldn’t play in college, and Russ remarked “You listened to her?!?”
These are just one rather public and two personal examples of adults somehow believing they have a crystal ball and can predict a kid’s future. And as the movie version of Billy Beane said, they don’t.
Unfortunately, here’s the sadder part of this story… if you’re reading this right now I’m willing to bet you know someone – or might even be someone – who was on the receiving end of such a comment. Why do adults feel the need to be this kind of a negative influence on kids?
What’s even worse is that people who are so-called “professionals”, people who are paid – sometimes millions of dollars – to evaluate young people’s athletic abilities, do it. Currently on HBO you can watch a documentary titled “38 At The Garden,” which “chronicles the extraordinary ascendance of point guard Jeremy Lin during his landmark 2012 season with the New York Knicks.” Lin won a state basketball championship in California, yet only got a single D1 basketball offer (Harvard), and then went undrafted by the NBA. Along the way he was either told verbally or by action that essentially, “You’re not going to the NBA! Give it up already.”
And yet they were wrong. So why do they do it?
There are those who will suggest that “pressure makes diamonds” and Negative Nancy’s just provide the inspiration these young people will need to achieve the greatness within them. To furnish them with the chip on their shoulder that creates winning motivation.
Others will say that “if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the fire.” That sports are tough and if you don’t have a thick skin and confidence, you won’t make it.
Still others will point to the very small percentage of high school athletes who are good enough to play collegiately, which in turn becomes an even smaller percentage that go on to play their sports professionally. Meaning that from a statistical standpoint you have a good chance of being right when you yell at a kid, “You’re not going to the NBA!”
But still, why do it?
With a hat-tip to Ted Lasso, we’re all human. We’re not perfect. None of us knows what’s going on in the lives of others that might cause them to do things. And to a great respect it’s none of our business. If either all of us or none of us were judged by our weakest moments, we might at least consider it fair. So maybe asking “why?” with the hope that people stop doing it is working the wrong end of the issue.
Well then, what about the athletes?
Although I’m an admittedly small sample size, I’ve had the pleasure of watching a lot of sports that our kids participated in over the last 20 years. Soccer, football, basketball and swimming. And here’s a taste of what I’ve witnessed. Kids who were outstanding athletically at an early age that peaked and didn’t get much better. Kids who picked up sports at a late age and almost immediately excelled. Kids who looked as if they would never get the hang of the sport and suddenly the light turned on. Kids who gradually got better year-after-year. Kids who were fantastic at a sport and just hung it up.
Yet, with all the sports-watching I’ve done, I didn’t internally predict any of those things. Nor did any of the other parents and coaches who verbalized their thoughts. Because we can’t. There is just too much unknown.
So, to the young athletes of today and tomorrow, I suggest that if someone tells you that you can’t play a sport well or excel in one, remember the line from the movie “Moneyball.” They don’t have a crystal ball. They can’t look at you and predict your future. The only thing that matters is what YOU think and want. Go get it.
