Ever since I was a little girl, there was this place in the woods on my parents’ property where the forest floor was covered with little dots of sun as the rays shone down through the trees.
That spot has always been magical to me.
At some point during my relationship with my husband, Greg, he learned of my fascination with this spot.
After two years of dating, he took me for a walk in the woods and proposed to me right here. And one year later, on Sept. 13, 2014, that’s where we were married.
It was one of the best days of my life, and although it was a wonderful event, there are things I would change if I had to do it all over again.
Here are a few tips I wish I would have known to avoiding mishaps, headaches and a few tears:
■ Don’t be too cheap
I was all about saving money on my wedding. I had a budget of $5,000, which is a relatively small amount. The average wedding costs about $25,000. I was cutting corners left and right, and feeling very proud of it while becoming a DIY queen. Although I had a “cheap” wedding, it didn’t look cheap. But, there are some things you just can’t be cheap about.
For example, I found robes for my bridesmaids on Etsy for $5 each, which I thought was a steal. When they arrived at my house, however, I tried one on and it looked like something for a 4-year-old. It came up to my waist and I couldn’t even close it. It was like a cardigan.
So, I learned my lesson and spent a little more on the next set of robes — this time they were $30 each. Keep in mind that the average cost of a good quality robe is around $50. In my mind, I was still saving money here.
On the morning of my wedding, the robes had still not arrived after being in transit for 36 days. My poor husband-to-be had to run to Kohl’s on the day of the wedding to buy five robes for me and my bridesmaids to get ready in. Lesson finally learned: Just buy the $50 robes.
■ Have a Plan B. And C. And D.
Both my ceremony and reception were outdoors. I had a tent for the reception, but I did not have one for the ceremony. Basically, rain was not an option.
I woke up the morning of my wedding to a downpour. And then I cried for about two hours.
I kept asking myself, and the people I was getting ready with, “What on earth are we going to do?” We would have to get married under the reception tent, but that wasn’t my “magical spot.” Rather, it was set up in my parents’ yard, and I did not want to get married in a yard.
Maybe I prayed to the sun gods enough, or maybe it was a miracle, but the weather finally cleared up around 2 p.m., which was two hours before my ceremony. But then, everyone had to run around like chickens with their heads cut off setting everything up. I originally thought everything would’ve been set up at this point, but now we had only two hours.
So, the moral of the story is, have a backup plan for bad weather if you are planning an outdoor wedding, and for everything in general. And, to be safe, have a backup plan for your backup plan.
■ Hire a videographer
I went back and forth about this. I wanted a video to be able to remember my day, but decided that I could remember it via wedding photos and that it wasn’t worth the cost. Generally, videographers are pretty expensive and I just couldn’t fit it anywhere in my budget. But video captures more emotion than photos. When I look at photos of me saying my vows to my husband, I’m clearly crying but I want to hear the emotion in my voice, and I want to remember every word I said to my husband.
If you can’t fit a videographer into your budget either, ask a friend or family member to record the ceremony on their phone, just so you have it. I really wish I would have thought to do that.
■ Use Pinterest, but in moderation
I depended pretty heavily on Pinterest when planning my wedding. I had 1,398 pins on my wedding board by the time it was all said and done, which gave me lots of DIY projects to do. Some of them actually turned out OK.
But the majority of them were major fails. I literally laughed out loud at a few of my outcomes when I compared them to the Pinterest photos. Then, I realized how much time I wasted on these impossible projects and it wasn’t funny anymore.
Pinterest is a helpful tool for getting inspiration and finding free templates, but be warned that not everything will turn out as it appears on the website. Don’t waste too much time on the little projects; people really won’t notice if you didn’t have little lace balls hanging from the ceiling.
■ Honor those who helped
We had an army of people helping me, from my mom’s friends who helped put bouquets together the day before the wedding to my dad’s friends who helped us set up the tent to my bridesmaids who helped me stuff invitations into envelopes. I was overwhelmed with how much help we had.
On the day of the wedding, we were behind on setting up because of the rain, so people were showing up for the wedding and my mom was still in her jeans and rain boots. Guests jumped in to help finish setting up so that everyone in the wedding party could get showered and dressed. I had cousins putting tablecloths on tables and aunts lighting candles until about 10 minutes before the ceremony. I don’t know what I would have done without them.
The problem is, I didn’t plan ahead for any kind of recognition or big “thank you” for all these generous helpers. I wish there was a way that we could have thanked them more for what they did besides a general “thank you” note. Looking back, I wish my husband or I would have made a speech during the reception or sent them all small gifts. I’m still not sure they know how much we appreciated them.
Wedding planning will happen faster than you expect. I know there are a ton of things I forgot to do, including forgetting to wear my veil. I didn’t even realize it until the next day. But guess what? No one even noticed.
It’s easy to get caught up in all the little things, but just remember what it’s really about: celebrating the start of your new life with your new spouse.
