Rudyard Kipling — Life Lessons
Joe Paterno had been asked thousands of times how he would like to be remembered. His answer was strikingly simple: “I hope people think I made Penn State a better place.”
On his last days here on Earth, Joseph Vincent Paterno, “JoePa,” was surrounded by family and loved ones in his hospital room. One of his grandchildren, also named Joe, asked his mother and father for a moment alone with his grandfather. Joe read his granddad the poem ‘If’ by Rudyard Kipling. The boy chose perfectly. The poem opens as follows:
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too
Joe Paterno defined success in many ways. He is the winningest major college football coach ever, leading teams to five undefeated seasons and two national titles. He did more for his school than any single person has ever done for any institution. Just try and imagine Penn State without 60-plus years of Paterno’s influence.
He was a loving husband, a father of five and a grandfather of 17. Moreover, because of what he stood for, he was an iconic figure respected and revered by virtually everyone inside the Penn State family and out.
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same
Paterno took Kipling to heart. He was the same man during good times and bad, and, more importantly, he afforded every person the same level of caring and respect regardless of his or her station. Joe managed to maintain personal friendships with giants of industry and presidents while still being a true man of the people. It was not an act; it was a way of life.
He didn’t want or require special treatment. I can remember walking through Manhattan one day — on our way to a fundraising dinner. Joe loved New Yorkers — being one himself. Every doorman we passed recognized him and said: ‘Hey, coach,’ and every one of them got a friendly greeting in return.
Sure, some of it was the goodwill ambassador in him, but mostly he just cared about people. Once he met you, he would remember your name forever.
The Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. — Character
The true measure of a man is not how he behaves in moments of comfort and convenience but how he stands at times of controversy and challenges. –The Rev. Martin Luther King Jr.
The real character of a man appears when no one is watching. Paterno embraced this belief, embodied it and lived it. Joe was the same man on camera and off. One memory in particular strikes a chord.
It was Oct. 25, 2003. Penn State had just lost, 26-14, to Iowa, before the loudest crowd of 70,397 people ever assembled in one place. Pressure was mounting on Paterno. Much had transpired since the No. 1 ranking Penn State held in 1999 — when the Nittany Lions were 9-0 going into the homecoming game against Minnesota.
Penn State finished 1999 with a 10-3 record. From 2000 through 2004, Paterno’s teams were 26-33 — an unusual period for Penn State football. By the time Penn State lost to Iowa in 2003, the team was in the throes of a six-game losing skid. The program was in a free fall, and Joe Paterno was the lightning rod for unprecedented dissatisfaction amongst the fans, the administration and even the Board of Trustees.
Rumors of Joe’s ouster went from being unthinkable to commonplace.
With all of that in mind, imagine how I felt when I was asked to escort Paterno from Iowa’s infamous pink locker room to the post-game press conference. Penn State was held to 38 yards rushing by the Hawkeyes. Joe’s record in his previous 48 games, inclusive of that day, was 22-26. The last place on Earth where Joe wanted to go was to a press conference.
As we stood in the empty hallway waiting for Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz to finish his press conference, I kept my mouth shut and stared intently at my shoes. Imagine my surprise when Coach Paterno looked up at me and said, “So, how you holding up, kid? This must be kind of tough for you.” I was speechless.
In a moment during when almost anyone would have been feeling down or sorry for himself, he was concerned about me. Joe didn’t do things because people were watching him or because someone was important. He simply did what he felt was right. I have never in my life met anyone with anywhere near his strength, unflappability and fortitude.
Bear Bryant — Adversity
The point in history that I believe most taught Paterno to deal with such adversity came long before 2003. In his own words, the most trying time in Paterno’s illustrious career came after losing the 1979 Sugar Bowl to his nemesis Paul “Bear” Bryant. Alabama won that game, 14-7, thanks to a heroic goal-line stand during which Penn State was stopped cold four times inside the Tide’s three-yard line.
I have heard Sue Paterno say Joe was devastated. I have heard Coach Paterno say many times that he nearly quit coaching after that game. Fortunately for Penn State fans, he did come back and led Penn State to national titles in 1982 and 1986, but he never did beat the Bear on the gridiron. Paterno was 0-4 against Bryant, yet he always seemed to love telling stories about him.
Although Bryant and Paterno were very different, they had a begrudging respect for each other. I have heard many times about Paul Bryant saying to Joe: “If I quit coaching, I’ll probably croak in a week.” It turns out he wasn’t too far off — he died just under four weeks from the day he retired.
After Joe broke Bryant’s Division I record for the most wins in 2001, the Bear Bryant museum sent him a package. I just happened to be in his office when he opened it. It was an enlarged photo of Bryant in his trademark pork pie hat and plaid jacket, leaning against a Beaver Stadium goal post.
Paterno looked at me and said: “Why the heck would they send me this? I don’t want this – do you want it?”
I did — and that photo now resides in the Penn State All-Sports Museum.
People have been asking me for years if I knew when Joe Paterno was going to retire. I would always say: “I don’t think even Joe knows that, and if he does know, he certainly wouldn’t tell me.”
My honest opinion is that the end of Bear Bryant’s career was a harbinger to Paterno. Joe died just 74 days from his last day of coaching.
If anyone ever asks you — please tell them Joe Paterno made Penn State a better place.
